On Amy

I realize it's been a bit since Amy’s passed, but I’d be remiss for letting the passing of such a Prophetess go unmentioned on BdG. At first I didn’t know what to say... There was something odd about Amy’s death. Lots of people in my iTunes have passed away, but I hardly wince when they do. When I learned that Amy died, I - for the first time - got emotional about someone whom I’d never met.

This is going to sound a tad bit insensitive since I’m in no place to judge how people feel, but it always irks me when people get sad about celebrities passing away because, they say, “I felt like I knew him.” Yes, you love his music; yes, you love her legacy; but what do you really know about him? Michael Jackson never wrote songs about his darkness. It’s only after his death that many ‘fans’ learned Luther Vandross was gay. We feel like we know them, but do we really?

Then I realized that that was the difference - why I felt so moved by Amy’s death in the same way that irritates me when I see it in others: what most artists hide in their closet, Amy wore on her sleeve. Amy didn’t sneak into the trailer for a sip from her flask, she was unapologetically drunk during the show. She lived her darkness & let it be part of her art. There was no pretending, no polite posturing - just Amy, always. I’ve been in the psychiatrist’s chair with her & I heard her tell him “I’m gonna lose my baby, so I always keep a bottle near.” I’ve watched her punch a fan while she was singing. Amy’s consistency on-stage & off meant that we knew her in a way we don’t know most other singers. Amy & I never had a personal relationship, I can’t say we were “friends,” but I know more about Amy than a lot of people I come across in my daily life & that’s because she was so honest.

So yes, we’ll miss the albums she’ll never produce like every other singer. But it’s not just her music, it’s not just her performance - it’s her.

As-salaam Momokum. [MdG]